SNL MEMORIES

Alex Trebek: "Burt Reynolds?"
Burt Reynolds: "Uh, that's not my name."
Alex Trebek: "Okay, Turd Ferguson?"
Burt Reynolds: "Yeah what do you want?"
Alex Trebek: "You buzzed in."
Burt Reynolds: "No, I didn't."
Alex Trebek: "Yes you did."
Burt Reynolds: "Yeah, well that's your opinion."

UNREAL!!

NUFF SAID

BREATHE A LITTLE EASIER, NOW, LADS

As long ago as 160 years ago, whenever the commonwealth of Massachusettes has had a vacancy in the congress, no matter how brief, the American Republic and Western Civilization has been a little safer....

FLORIDA NUMBER TWO PARTY SCHOOL????? THE PROMISE

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE KIRK HERBSTREIT?

Q: Everyone talks about Tim Tebow and how he is one of the best college football players of all time. What are your thoughts on his place in college football history?

A: In my lifetime, not to make this an overdramatic comment, but I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a guy have as big an impact on a powerhouse program as I’ve seen from Tim Tebow from Day 1. I think GameDay was down at LSU-Florida his first year as a freshman and you hear about Tim Tebow, but you hear about a lot of guys. I remember when he took the field for a third-and-short with Chris Leak as the starting quarterback and he pushed that entire defense back 5 yards. I had never seen a stadium react to a player like that. I said to (Chris) Fowler it’s like he’s Roy Hobbs from the movie “The Natural.” It’s been a love affair from that point on. I can only imagine what it’s going to be like his last go around.

If he ends up achieving his goal, he could potentially be a part of 3 national championships, 3 SEC championships and maybe 2 Heisman Trophies. I know we’ve had a lot great players in the last 100 years in college football, but I don’t know if there’s anybody that can come close to accomplishing that on the field and then you throw in all the things he represents, the bar has been set in my mind with what he’s doing right before our eyes.

PRESEASON POLLS

2009 NCAA Football Rankings - Preseason

Season: 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009
Week: Preseason

Other Polls Index USA Today Associated Press Harris Poll Legends Poll BCS standings ESPN.com Power Rankings ESPN.com Bottom 10 ESPNU Allstate Standings

College Football Videos

AP Top 25

1. Florida (58) 0-0 1,498

2. Texas (2) 0-0 1,424

3. Oklahoma 0-0 1,370

4. USC 0-0 1,313

5. Alabama 0-0 1,156

6. Ohio State 0-0 1,113

7. Virginia Tech 0-0 1,054

8. Mississippi 0-0 1,047

9. Oklahoma State 0-0 989

9. Penn State 0-0 989

11. LSU 0-0 914

12. California 0-0 746

13. Georgia 0-0 714

14. Boise State 0-0 659

15. Georgia Tech 0-0 593

16. Oregon 0-0 587

17. TCU 0-0 521

18. Florida State 0-0 307

19. Utah 0-0 289

20. Brigham Young 0-0 267

21. North Carolina 0-0 261

22. Iowa 0-0 229

23. Notre Dame 0-0 225

24. Nebraska 0-0 207

25. Kansas 0-0 134

Others Receiving Votes Oregon State 122, Illinois 105, Pittsburgh 103, Michigan State 100, Rutgers 83, Texas Tech 76, West Virginia 57, Cincinnati 44, Clemson 42, Miami (FL) 40, East Carolina 30, Tennessee 15, Arizona 13, North Carolina State 10, Boston College 9, CENTRL MICHIGAN 7, Auburn 7, UCLA 7, Northwestern 5, South Florida 3, Southern Miss 3, Vanderbilt 3, Missouri 3, South Carolina 2, Nevada 1, Arkansas 1, Houston 1, TROY 1, Tulsa 1.

Complete Rankings

USA Today Poll

1. Florida (53) 0-0 1,466

2. Texas (4) 0-0 1,386

3. Oklahoma (1) 0-0 1,358

4. USC (1) 0-0 1,321

5. Alabama 0-0 1,134

6. Ohio State 0-0 1,126

7. Virginia Tech 0-0 1,020

8. Penn State 0-0 988

9. LSU 0-0 917

10. Mississippi 0-0 889

11. Oklahoma State 0-0 861

12. California 0-0 711

13. Georgia 0-0 707

14. Oregon 0-0 694

15. Georgia Tech 0-0 559

16. Boise State 0-0 542

17. TCU 0-0 461

18. Utah 0-0 404

19. Florida State 0-0 371

20. North Carolina 0-0 293

21. Iowa 0-0 257

22. Nebraska 0-0 236

23. Notre Dame 0-0 194

24. Brigham Young 0-0 178

25. Oregon State 0-0 165

Others Receiving Votes Kansas 138, Michigan State 136, Texas Tech 114, Cincinnati 90, Pittsburgh 64, West Virginia 55, Rutgers 51, Miami (FL) 46, Missouri 44, Illinois 38, Clemson 30, South Carolina 18, UCLA 14, Auburn 12, South Florida 11, Nevada 11, Kentucky 9, North Carolina State 7, Wisconsin 6, Arkansas 6, Northwestern 5, Southern Miss 4, Wake Forest 4, Arizona 3, Boston College 3, CENTRL MICHIGAN 3, East Carolina 3, Colorado 2, Maryland 2, Navy 2, Tennessee 2, TROY 1, Minnesota 1, Michigan 1, Houston 1.

Complete Rankings

THE TRUTH

I am the moral compass by which you can be guided through the Sea of Deception in which you find yourself. I am unfettered by the strings of bias and self-interest. You can throw your hook here and find a sturdy anchorage to THE TRUTH.

I can see clearly through the fog of Treason and vile ignorance that has pervaded this orb.

In a world void of any logic or reason, I can cut through the insanity for you and show you the right path.

God Save us all from the cruel and mindless zombies attempting to enslave us. We will smite them down and emerge victorious--arise from the ashes and create a newer better American Republic if we need to, after they destroy this civilization and return to the depths of burning hell from which they came!!!.

Thier stinking corpses will fertilize a new civilization founded on Truth and Justice. To hell with Obama and Pelosi!!!

vikings pre-season stuff

Kick Returns

Player	Returns	Yds	Yds/Ret	Long	TD
Percy Harvin	2	53	26.5	28	0
Darius Reynaud	2	43	21.5	26	0
Jaymar Johnson	1	26	26.0	26	0

Player Rec Yds Yds/Rec Long TD
Visanthe Shiancoe 6 97 16.2 29 1
Darius Reynaud 5 102 20.4 64 1
Albert Young 5 25 5.0 9 0
Sidney Rice 4 38 9.5 21 0
Ian Johnson 3 33 11.0 15 0
Jeff Dugan 2 14 7.0 10 0
Percy Harvin 2 9 4.5 5 0

LIFE IS GOOD

It is 8:14 a.m. on a Sunday morning in Palm Harbor and 79 degrees. Rosie is still asleep and Princess Sackashit (Sadie) is here with me. Breakfast with the Gators comes on in a few minutes and we will relive the 2008 SEC championship game against 'Bama.

Florida Gators quarterback Tim Tebow was held out of first-team repetitions during this week's practices, including Saturday's scrimmage, Coach Urban Meyer said today.

Tebow has been experiencing tightness in his back this week, but Meyer said that is not why he held him out of practice. It was partly to allow backup quarterback John Brantley significant playing time, he said.

Meyer said Tebow's back injury is not serious, and the senior quarterback is expected to take his usual repetitions on Monday.

"There is no disc issue, and [Tebow] will be full speed Monday. He's fine," Meyer said.

The Gators held out numerous players from Saturday's scrimmage to provide rest for starters. Linebacker Brandon Spikes also sat out but is not injured, Meyer said.

Go Gators!!

THUNDER

It is 8:33 a.m. and Rosie is out, Sadie here with me, sleeping, what else?

Ate in Ozona last nite at Molly Goodhead's...

Looks like we may be going to the Tennessee game with Junior and Beaver!!!

GO GATORIANS!!!

WHY WE HATE OBAMA (AND IT'S NOT BECAUSE HE'S A DARKy)

We don't hate Obama because he's a simple-minded colored fellah.

We don't hate Obama because he's a foreigner masquerading as an American.

We don't hate Obama because of his thin resume and lack of qualifications.

We don't hate Obama because he's an uppity arrogant empty suit.

We don't hate him because he smells bad.

We hate Obama because he hates us, hates America, hates Democracy, hates capitalism and hates everything that is good and decent about this country.

We hate him because he is a Marxist, Atheist traitor who bows to foreign kings.

oh my!

Danny Sheridan of USA Today installed Florida as a 73-point favorite against Charleston Southern on Sept. 5.

You read that right, 73 points.

TODAY

It is 7:41 and 81 degrees in Palm Harbor. Rosie is here and Sadie too.
FROM THE INBOX:

IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ACCIDENTALLY, ILLEGALLY, YOU
GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR......

BUT IF YOU CROSS THE US BORDER INTENTIONALLY, ILLEGALLY, YOU GET A DRIVER'S LICENSE, SOCIAL SECURITY CARD, AND FREE HEALTH CARE?

WHO'S BRIGHT IDEA WAS THIS ? ? ? ?

(Americans must be stupid!)

gogators

TOBY

The Dog From The Wrong Side of The Tracks

His name was Toby. He was about a six-month-old pup, purportedly half Springer and half Brittany Spaniel. He was basically all white, long haired, with a black head and a black ring around his stubby tail. Toby lived under the kitchen range in an apartment on the wrong side of the tracks, in a neighborhood called the “Gut” in Ridgewood, New Jersey. At that time I was a seven-year-old boy, an only child, just waiting to turn eight so I could join the Cub Scouts. My Mom and Dad took me to the “Gut” and we adopted Toby and he was to become my best friend and my constant childhood companion.

Toby and I grew up together in Florida, during the fifties and sixties, in a bygone era of orange groves, sand, gopher turtles, and other things, about three miles from the Gulf of Mexico and the Beach. We listened to WOWO in bed at night and listened to the Whistle of the Orange Blossom Special. We chased birds, captured rattlesnakes, fished and did all the hundreds of things a boy and his dog do together.

Now, Toby was a gentle soul with people. You could practically reach down his throat and retrieve food out of his belly and he wouldn’t complain a bit. But with other male dogs, it was a different deal. Toby was somewhat of a ladies man a la Disney’s “Lady and the Tramp”. Now in those days, nobody tied their dogs up; they all ran free just like the kids. Once a year, like clockwork, Toby would take off and be gone for a week or two. My Dad would drive me around town, we’d yell for him and I’d go to bed each night praying for his safety. Eventually one night, we’d find him, on the wrong side of the tracks, full of dirt, insects, matted hair and dried blood. We’d bring him home, clean him up, bandage him, he’d have it out of his doggy system, and he’d be good to go for another year.

I don’t know how many fights he fought, or how many little Toby’s may have been running around, but I do know he was the boss dog for miles around. One spring, a boxer bitch was in heat on our street. Every day, after I got home from school, I’d have to drag Toby’s sorry butt off their front porch and take him home. All the other neighborhood dogs sat a safe distance away, across the street watching, because Toby had whipped their collective asses for the privilege of sitting on the porch. That boxer must have slipped out of the house unaccompanied at some point, because she had a litter, and they weren’t little boxers, but Toby and I kind of laid low about that time. Tobe had a long and successful career at this sort of thing and had the scars to prove it…including an ear with a two-inch tear in it.

A boy couldn’t have had a better pal than old Tobe. I did join the Cub Scouts and went on to become an Eagle Scout. When the time came, I went away to college, but when I came home summers to work, there he was, that stumpy tail wagging a little slower, and you could tell he was getting old. When I was done with University, I had the opportunity to spend a year in the Orient. My Mother wrote often, telling me the news of home, and always mentioning Toby. Then came the letter that said nothing of the old dog. And he was never mentioned in another letter. My mom hadn’t the heart to put it in words, but I knew. The old boy had passed to the Rainbow Bridge, to wait for me and chase birds and butterflies and be young again, and who knows? Maybe a trip or two to the other side of the tracks. ---Lead Dog

Pvt. Lead Dog & Toby

1941

CACHING ALONG THE PINELLAS TRAIL

It is 10:31 and 84 degrees in Palm harbor Fla. Rosie is at work and Sadie and Ben are here with me.

more later Go Gators

1940

JUNIOR'S NEW RIDE???

OLD SHOT OF TRADER RICK

Sadie is here with me, Rosie is out At 8:43 A.M., it is 81 degrees in Palm Harbor.

Ate Gator Tail at Tarpon Turtle last night.

You know it occurs to me while listening to Obama on TV calling people that disagree with him a "mob" that he is not merely a Marxist Stooge and Anti-American Moron, but has graduated into being just another anoying nigger, albeit one who has the power to destroy our civilization...

FOUR YEARS AGO TODAY:

Monday, August 08, 2005

THE REAL-LIFE UNDEAD

It's 5:38, Patrick got up and went back to bed with Junior. It's 67 degrees out, visibility about ten miles.

It is our fervent hope that the middle eastern societies' leaders wake from their drug-induced slumbers and view clearly the state of affairs that has consumed them. They must exterminate the vermine in their midst, so that the civilized world won't be forced to turn their medieval culture into a minor footnote of history.

When I was in the U.S. Army, we hated our enemy, but we respected his abilities. He waged a ruthless and brutal war against his own civilian population, just as out present-day enemy does. But at least he had an inkling of what he was fighting for, and had some vision, however misguided,for the future.


Today's enemy is comprised of mindless zombie-puppets of the souless minions of Evil. That's just the way it is.

-30-

posted by Trader Rick @ 6:51 AM 0 comments links to this post

GO GATORS!!

WE BE NUMBER ONE

Rosie and Sadie are here at 7:27 and 79 degrees.

We ate cheeseburgers hot off the grill and drank numerous PBR's at Hooter Island outside table while listening to live Bluegrass-Gospel music last night.

The USA Today preseason poll

1. Florida (53) - 13-1
2. Texas (4) - 12-1
3. Oklahoma (1) - 12-2
4. Southern California (1) 12-1
5. Alabama - 12-2
6. Ohio State - 10-3
7. Virginia Tech - 10-4
8. Penn State - 11-2
9. LSU - 8-5
10. Mississippi - 9-4
11. Oklahoma State - 9-4
12. California - 9-4
13. Georgia - 10-3
14. Oregon - 10-3
15. Georgia Tech - 9-4
16. Boise State - 12-1
17. TCU - 11-2
18. Utah - 13-0
19. Florida State - 9-4
20. North Carolina - 8-5
21. Iowa - 9-4
22. Nebraska - 9-4
23. Notre Dame - 7-6
24. Brigham Young - 10-3
25. Oregon State - 9-4

Next up for the Florida Gators

Record: 0-0 (0-0)
Next Game: Sept. 5,
vs. Charleston Southern, TBD
Last Game: Jan. 8,
d. Oklahoma (BCS Title Game) 24-14

go gators!

1938

IT IS 7:21, ROSIE IS HERE AND SO IS SADIE AND IT IS 79 DEGREES IN PALM HARBOR

NEWEST VIKING

Florida football coach Urban Meyer's reward for winning a second national championship in three years is a new six-year contract that will pay him $4 million annually.

The agreement makes Meyer the highest-paid coach in the SEC and third-highest in college football.

MANKATO, Minn. — Former Gator Percy Harvin was one of the first Minnesota Vikings players on the practice field Sunday afternoon. The rookie wide receiver was understandably anxious, after missing the first four practices of training camp while waiting for his contract to be finalized.

Ah, life is good Go Gators!

PROMISE KEPT

Before meeting Tim Tebow, I was an alcoholic. I was absolutely horrible to my friends and family. Then I met the man and we had a very pleasant conversation about cats. After that, I found myself wanting to get drunk less. Tim Tebow helped me learn to get drunk on life. And his favorite breed of cat is the Siamese.

Richard J. – Tampa, FL

I have been pirating music for years. My computer has over ten thousand songs on it and none of them are paid for. Then I saw Tim Tebow in the halls of the University of Florida. I introduced myself and we chatted about backpacks. An hour later, I am back in my dorm room clearing my hard drive and registering on iTunes. Thank you Tim Tebow and I hope you are enjoying your JanSport.

Hank F. – Gainesville, FL

I was extremely excited when I got the opportunity to meet Tim Tebow. He was a very nice person. We had an interesting talk about how my husband and I have been having trouble conceiving. He told me he was sorry to hear that, but he had a feeling it would work out if we kept trying. That night, my husband and I tried again. When I got dressed the next morning, I was thrilled to find a twenty dollar bill that I had forgotten about in the pocket of my jeans. I can’t help but think Tim Tebow played a part in my good fortune. Oh, and we still haven’t conceived because it turns out my husband is sterile.

Susan G. – Jacksonville, FL

FRIED CONCH

It is 9:10 a.m. and 81 degrees in Palm Harbor, Fla. Rosie is out doing her thing and I am here and Sadie is in the backyard doing dog things.

Last night we ate at the Thirsty Marlin in downtown Palm Harbor. I had deep fried conch, black beans and rice and onion rings and a Landshark. Rosie had Mahi Mahi and fries and a couple of lights.. Very Good. Finished up at the Legion with a few cool ones.

HEy, look!!

Citrus Ads To Feature the Voice of Tom Selleck

December 20, 2007

Remember Magnum P.I.?

Tom Selleck is back in a voice over role with a $90,000 contract as spokesman for Florida orange juice in new 15- and 30-second spots scheduled to air in January.

The Florida Department of Citrus hopes its new OJ ads will have a “magnum” impact of sales.

The Florida Citrus Commission, the department’s governing body, approved the new ads Wednesday.

Selleck’s voice-over narration takes center stage as viewers watch a cascade of orange juice going from pitcher to glass.

“Food scientists have spent years with their beakers and flasks and chemistry sets, trying to come up with something as good for you as Florida orange juice,” says Selleck’s deep baritone. “But they’ve never come close. Start your day with almost 25 percent of your daily recommended fruit and vegetable servings in one 8-ounce glass.”

To close the commercial, Selleck suggests, “It’s a miracle in every way. Florida orange juice. Healthy. Pure and simple.”

Go Gators!