Monday, February 12, 2007

TRADER RICK FOR PRESIDENT?

Breaking News from Bippus, Indiana:

Trader Rick has decided NOT to initiate an exploratory committee for the purposes of raising money for a presidential bid --

Trader Rick has a B.A. degree in American History.
Trader Rick has an American Name.
Trader Rick has an MBA
Trader Rick was a Project Manager for Management Consulting Firms.
Trader Rick ran successful projects at such Fortune 500 companies as Hughes Aircraft, General Electric, Allen-Bradley, Firestone, etc.
Trader Rick is an Eagle Scout.
Trader Rick is a U.S. Army veteran with a tour of duty in Southeast Asia.
Trader Rick is NOT a lawyer or politician.
Trader Rick knows all the state capitals.
Trader Rick is not a cuckolded socialist bitch.
Traders Rick's spouse was not a lying habitual cheater.
Trader Rick doesn't look like a monkey with a buzz cut.
Trader Rick knows how to re-roof a house.
Trader Rick no longer smokes cigarettes.
Trader Rick never snorted "Blow."
Trader Rick's parents were Americans.
Trader Rick's parents were not atheists or muslims.
Trader Rick never engaged is illegal real-estate deals.
Trader Rick has never lied to millions of people.
Trader Rick wants America to WIN the Global War on Terrorism.
Trader Rick believes infanticide is wrong.
Trader Rick supports the 2nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.
Trader Rick believes special interest groups such as negroes, gays, violent criminals, illegal aliens, friends of politicians, etc. should not get special treatment not afforded to other Americans.
Trader Rick thinks U.S. Border Guards should be allowed to shoot Mexicans, but the BATF and FBI should not be allowed to burn Christians to death with tanks and black helos.
Trader Rick thinks Americans are WAY WAY overtaxed.
Trader Rick believes in Capitalism, and LIMITED GOVERNMENT.
Trader Rick doesn't think the U.S. Supreme Court is part of the Legislative Branch.
Trader Rick thinks the UNO is a SICK joke.

TRADER RICK THINKS HE IS WAY WAY UNDERQUALIFIED TO BE POTUS.


TRADER RICK KNOWS HE IS WAY WAY BETTER QUALIFIED TO BE POTUS THAN EITHER HILLARDY ROD-HAM CLINTON OR BARRACK OSAMA-BAMA.

posted by Trader Rick @ 3:22 PM   5 comments

5 Comments:

At Mon Feb 12, 11:23:00 PM 2007, Blogger Lone Ranger said...

In item 11, you might want to change the word "husband" to "spouse." Otherwise, you'll go to the top of the Democrats' shortlist.

 
At Tue Feb 13, 09:34:00 AM 2007, Blogger Trader Rick said...

You are right of course. I've changed it. Wouldn't want to be on any kind of list like that!!

 
At Wed Feb 14, 05:30:00 AM 2007, Blogger DAKOTARANGER said...

You've got my vote. There's no way I can vote for Brownbeck, Guilliani, McCain. The really sad thing is the only person I see I remotely like is Richardson. So if you throw your hat in the ring I can vote for someone that more or less aggrees with me

 
At Wed Feb 14, 06:50:00 PM 2007, Blogger Trader Rick said...

Hey Dak, what about DUNCAN HUNTER?

 
At Thu Feb 15, 05:47:00 AM 2007, Blogger DAKOTARANGER said...

Don't know enough about him yet. He's on the list as well as Newt. Not really ready for the election season yet anywy. And people complain about Christmas coming earlier every year?!?!

 

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