BAMA BOY'S 'BARRASSMENT

It is 6:31 a.m. and Patrick has joined Stephen and Junior downstairs in sleepy-land.


American Idol? Taylor Hicks? We don't think so. Spazzy's big night was marred by the fact that for anyone listening, it was obvious that there are at LEAST nine finalists with more talent than he has.

How do you take a show that takes ten seconds and turn it into a two hour mess? Pair up all the losers with pros and let them sing. Actually, tho, dog, it worked for me. The girls were great and anyone of them should have been Idol over Taylor. Sound like sour grapes from the dogyard? Maybe.

Unfortunately for KAT, who was practically topless--YES!--, and who we predict a bigger career than for Spazzy, she had to sing with one of our favorites, Meatloaf, who was just awful, and Kate looked embarrassed for him.

The Burt Bacharack(sic) round of songs was great, as it showcased the talents of all the contestants except for Chris, Elliot and Taylor, who stunk the place up. Even geek boy Kevin did good.

The clincher was when Kat and Spazzy sang Time of My Life as a duet. We rated Kat a perfect ten and Spaz seven at best. That was the head-to-head that proved our point.

Ryan waited until the last two minutes of the show to annoint Taylor.

Oh, well. Kellie, see ya in the movies, darlin' and Kat--you can be in my CD changer anyday.