RUNNER-UP U.

FROM THE ZOOK FREE ZONE:

Ohio State to discontinue football, basketball

By BEN DOVER, IP Sports Writer
April 6, 2007

COLUMBUS, Ohio (IP) -- Ohio State president Karen A. Holbrook announced today at a surprise news conference that the university will discontinue its two major sports programs, football and men's basketball, effective immediately. Holbrook said the reason was, quite simply, the Florida Gators.

"After speaking at length with many of our boosters, we felt this was the best thing for the university," Holbrook said. "Our football and basketball teams each have a long history of excellence. We feel that to continue, especially after being completely dominated by the University of Florida, would tarnish that history."

OSU head football coach Jim Tressel did not take the news well, she said.

"I've had to counsel Jim quite a bit," Holbrook revealed. "He's almost inconsolable."

Holbrook said the idea started making the rounds immediately after the Buckeyes were pounded 41-14 by Florida in the BCS championship game on Jan. 8 in Glendale, Ariz.

"Some of our boosters were extremely vocal about it," she said. "I mean, we were number one all season, and then bam - the Gators made us look like a powder puff team."

Holbrook said she was able to hold off the boosters who wanted to quit until the Buckeye basketball team's loss in the NCAA Championship game Monday night.

"That was the nail in the coffin, as it were," she said. "Thad Matta came storming into my office Tuesday morning, demanding that we make the decision."

Matta, the school's men's basketball coach, said he had mixed emotions.

"Don't get me wrong, I could not be any prouder of these guys," Matta said. "It's hard because I love this team and I don't want it to end. But sometimes in life, you have to make the hard choices. We had a nice run. But once again, the Gators showed us to be overrated. I think it's time to hang it up. Besides, I think I'd be a better assistant coach. I'm going to give Billy Donovan a call next week."

Florida football coach Urban Meyer, a native Ohioan who once served as an assistant at Ohio State, said he felt the school made the right decision.

"I know it was hard for them," Meyer said. "They're used to being one of the top sports programs. But I think it's obvious to everybody that the sun has set on the Buckeyes. Better to go out now, while they can still salvage some self respect for what they did forty years ago."

UF president Bernie Machen said he respected the school's decision as well.

"It always seemed to me that they were living on past glory," Machen said. "I mean really, times have changed. Teams have gotten faster, stronger. Sure, they can still walk all over third-tier Big 10 teams and can beat Michigan. But come on, what's that worth, truly?"

Tressel, finally reached by telephone while vacationing in Trenton, N.J., was in tears.

"This is very painful for Jimmy," Tressel said, referring to himself in the third person for no known reason. "Jimmy doesn't like to lose. Jimmy wants to wear the red sweater vest. Jimmy likes shiny things. Jimmy would like to have a pet monkey."

The rest of Tressel's comments were largely unintelligible, and often profane. He muttered something about not wanting "to be Urban Meyer's bitch anymore" and hung up the telephone.

The school will now focus on its other sports programs, and academics, Holbrook stated.

"The sad thing is, UF has us beat in most of those areas as well," Holbrook said. "But for now, nobody seems to know about it."

The university was founded in 1870 as a land-grant university and is currently considered one of the best public universities in Ohio.


OSU head football coach Jim Tressel did not take the news well.